YOU MIGHT BE A WEAPONS LOADER IF...    (If you don't understand any these, don't worry, only a real Loader  would!)     

You've ever said, "Oh yes sir, it's supposed to look like that."   

You've ever sucked LOX to cure a hangover.   

You know what JP-4, JP-5, or JP-8 tastes like.   

You've ever used safety wire as a toothpick.   

You've ever had to say, "My boots are still black!" (or ever spray  painted them back)   

You've ever used soot from the tailpipe to blacken your boots   

You believe a jammer has a soul.   

You talk to the bombs or missiles during a load.   

The only thing you know about any city is where the good bars are.   

You know more about your coworkers than you do about your own  family.   

You can't figure out why maintenance officers exist.   

You ever wished the pilot would just say, "Great chaff/flare."   

You take it as a badge of honor just to be called "knuckle dragging  load  toad."   

You can't comprehend why everyone doesn't want to be a Loader.   

You think everyone who isn't a loader is a wimp.   

You wonder who the idiots are that keep making up stupid rules.   

You consider 'Moly-B' fingerprints on food an acquired taste.   

You've ever been told, "Get some prop wash, a yard of flightline, or  keys to a jet."   

You've ever jumped into an intake to get out of the rain.   

You consider TDY a paid vacation.   

The phrase, "Oh, by the way..." makes you twitch uncontrollably.   

Little yellow earplugs, and "SKILCRAFT" grease pencils are all over  your  house.   

You have ever loaded in really bad weather only to learn that flying  was  CANX an hour ago.   

Your spouse refuses to watch any aviation shows or attend air shows  with  you.   

The fridge in your barracks room is only stocked with beer!   

You have ever looked for jets you've loaded in aviation magazines  and  books.   

You know you are on the best load crew in the world and your crew  will  beat the crap out of anyone who says otherwise.   

You can't figure out why two weeks of advance per-diem is gone in  two  days.   

You can sleep anywhere, anytime. But as soon as engines shut down  you  are ready to load.   

You have ever slept on a loaded bomb trailer.   

You have ever stood on chocks to get a better look in the gun bay.   

You have ever used Dykes to trim your fingernails.   

You have ever pulled the gun switch while brake riding.   

You have ever downloaded chaff/flare in a hangar.   

You have ever wiped your hands on your pants.   

You have ever yelled, "If you ain't Ammo...You're waiting on them!"   

You have ever worn someone else's hat just to go to the chow hall.   

All you care about is turn times and your days off.   

You have ever had to download a jet an hour after loading it.   

Everyone you know has some kind of nickname.   

You have ever used the "Pull Chocks" hand signal to tell you buddies  it's time to leave.   

You hate that people working at the gym handing out towels get the  same  pay as you.   

You have ever been tack! led, duct taped to chair, covered in PET and  sand, egged, sour milked, peanut butter and jellied, and slid under  the  emergency shower in 30 degree weather.   

You know in your heart that ALS's are female.    

You have lookouts for QA or load barn.   

You hate Ops, MOC, QA, SP's, Finance, CBPO (MPF) and the Hospital.   

You've ever made a new pilot buy you a beer so he could write on a  bomb.   

You enjoy drinking beer after work and watching the Navy guys load  using  "hernia bars".   

You think JP-8 and wintergreen Skoal taste good together.   

You know the international marshalling sign for "pull your head out  of  your ass."   

You know the words "beer", taxi", and "hotel" in three different  languages.   

You've ever worked weekend duty on a jet that isn't flying on  Monday.   

You've wished for the jet to start up so you could get warm.   

You can't remember half of your coworkers! real names...only their  nicknames.   

You fix 30 million dollar jets, but can't figure out what's wrong  with  your $150 lawnmower.   

Your toolbox at home has wheels and foam cutouts, just like the ones  at  work.   

Some of the tools at your house are etched or at least scratched  over.   

You measure the cost of living in other countries by how much a beer costs off base.   

You still refer to yourself as a 462!!!